The Other Side of Sadness

A renowned psychologist argues against our conventional understanding of grief, and argues that we are far more resilient than we realize "A deep and intelligent book… It's heartening to discover that grieving is not 'work,' we don't have to be successful at it, and we're stronger than we know." ―Slate The conventional view of grieving-encapsulated by the famous five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance-is defined by a mourning process that we can only hope to accept and endure. In The Other Side of Sadness, psychologist and emotions expert George Bonanno argues otherwise. Our inborn emotions-anger and denial, but also relief and joy-help us deal effectively with loss. To expect or require only grief-stricken behavior from the bereaved does them harm. In fact, grieving goes beyond mere sadness, and it can actually deepen interpersonal connections and even lead to a new sense of meaning in life.

George A. Bonanno is professor of clinical psychology and chair of the Department of Counseling and Clinical Psychology at Columbia University's Teachers College. He lives in New York City with his wife and two children.